Vol. 3, Ch. 5 - Puns, Princesses, and the Pursuit of Snappiness.

     "ser", Yoshi finished as the two of them found themselves facing the Koopa King.

     "BWAHAHAHA!  I have you now...the wrong people! Daisy, Yoshi, what in the name of Wiggler are you doing here?"

     "Thought you knew, Bowser, since it was your black hole that dropped us in your courtyard in your castle in front of you," replied Daisy acridly.

     "No doubt about any of that!  But, I never see you here!  What brought you to my kingdom?"

     "A vanishing plant, Bowser," replied Yoshi.

     "WHAAAT!?!" roared the enraged royalty.  "HOW DARE -wait...that makes no sense!"

     "It's true, though.  Unfortunately, I'll never have time to explain because of two things.  One, I have to leave, and, two, you haven't given me a chance to talk."

      "Your arrogance is so very much like you, Yoshi!  To think, Yoshis and Koopas could have had an invincible alliance...if not for-"

      "The fact that the Koopa Kingdom is a Konglomeration of Korruption lacking Kredibility or Klass" interrupted Daisy.

     "Very funny.  The joke's on you, though! You spelled that sentence incorrectly!"

     "We're really getting off subject, Bowser," Yoshi interposed.

     "Fine.  Since you'll be here for a while anyways, how about explaining why you stepped foot into my domain?"

     "Well," began Daisy, "It began with a vanishing plant that-"

     "Yes, you mentioned that already.  AND...?"

     "And assuming you stop interrupting I'll explain how it got there."

     At this point, however, Bowser wasn't listening.  He already had other things on his mind.  Here he had one Princess imprisoned in his castle, and she had basically volunteered!  He also had Mario's best friend- this could be the chance for the showdown of the ages!  Only problem- he still didn't have Peach.  Mario wouldn't come if the Mushroom Princess was still safe at home.  No...he needed the Peach if Mario were to show.  So were the Koopa King's thoughts as Daisy told her tale.

     "Enough!  I couldn't really care less about why you're here.  I just wanted you to talk so the court stenographer...WHO ISN'T HERE...worthless Koopa Kids...anyways, whatever!  Thank you for the opportunity!"

    "What opportunity?!" asked a fully frustrated Daisy.

    "The opportunity for a showdown!  Now I only need Peach!"

    "Bowser!" cried Yoshi.  "Why in the world does Peach even have anything to do with this?"

    "None of your business, Yoshi!  Now get in an egg where you belong!"

    At which saying he trapped the unfortunate Yoshi and placed a Hammer Bro at guard.

    "As for you," he said, turning to Daisy, "Do you prefer towers or basements?"

    "Oh, Bowser...you really never learn, do you?"

    "I have a healthy disregard for stupid lessons."

    "Like the ones you've ignored for...how long?"

    "As long as has been necessary."

    "Shoulda figured you'd say that."

    "Guards...take Daisy somewhere she'll be comfortable."

    "Um...I'm not letting your goons just carry me out, Bowser!"

    "I could always slingshot Yoshi into my moat."

    "Fine, fine!  Don't be so..."

    "Clever?"

    "NOT the word I was going to use."

    As Daisy was led to her dungeon and Bowser began planning, Mario and Luigi were spending a not-so-quiet day at Peach's castle, watching the great Professor Elvin Gadd demonstrate his latest discoveries.

    "You will observe, lady and gentlemen," he said, holding up what looked like a Roman candle combined with a ShopVac, "that this device can fire at a range of over 3000 yards!"

    "That's wonderful, Professor," answered Luigi, "But what does it actually do?"

    "Do?  Ah, such a practical fellow, Luigi!  Why, but of course, it turns things invisible!  Powered by the rare and fascinating vanishing plant, it renders the target completely imperceptible to the world!  The original plant would also render a person inaudible, but I determined how to negate that effect, making this device perfect for hiding people you don't want to see!"

    "I can't think of anyone I wouldn't want to see," replied Peach.

    "Except, Bowser, perhaps?" replied Gadd.

    "Well, I like to be able to see him so I know when he's up to something."

    E. Gadd shook his head sadly.  "Ah, you kids never know the wonders of technology until someone puts it into the palm of your hand.  I will demonstrate the device's effectiveness for you, however!  Observe the supporting pillar 100 feet away!  I will now render it invisible!"

    With this he fired a shot of light, and the pillar disappeared.

    "Wow," said Mario.

    "You see!" cried the excited scientist, "Even Mario is impressed.  Tell me this device has no practical value and I shall eat my glasses!"

    "Um..." began the Princess, but before she could gently explain that there really was no practical value in the device, they heard an annoying laugh.

    "I see they sent the advance guard," said Luigi.

    "This can only mean that Bowser has some evil plan!" announced the Professor.

    "Yes," replied Peach, "I think we can safely conclude that.  Lock the castle down.  I'm really in no mood for burnt steak again tonight."

     Mario looked outside.  Bowser Jr. was leading the Koopa Troop towards Peach's castle.  The drawbridge would keep the ground forces out, but the flying troops would be in sooner than he could say "Mama-Mia."  Perhaps the Professor's device had a point after all.

     "Mario? Aren't you going to do something?" asked Luigi.  "The Koopa Troop is coming.  What's the plan?"

     He followed his brother's gaze to E. Gadd's device.  "You mean..."

     "Yes."

     "Okay.  You sure you know what you're doing?"

     "Oh, it's perfectly safe!" interjected the Professor.  "No harm will come to Peach at all!"

     "Will it wear off, though?" asked Peach.

     "Yes, after a few hours, I believe.  Alright Mario, go ahead."

     "Here we go!"

     Mario fired the beam and the Princess vanished.  A second later they could all hear Bowser Jr. laughing outside the window.

     "Peach?" asked Luigi.

     "Right here.  So begins the castle defense.  You've got this, guys."

     Mario smiled.  "Okie-dokie!"

Continued next week

Vol. 3, Ch. 4 - Standby for Beanstalks.

     "We both know you're bluffing, Ludwig," said Yoshi defiantly.  "You couldn't hurt me if you tried."

     "Is that a challenge?"

     "I happen to be here doing nothing of harm to anyone.  Why stop me in the first place?"

     Daisy noticed that as Yoshi spoke he kept hopping a little bit, bumping her up and down. Understanding his meaning, she jumped off and walked about ten feet away, leaving the orange on his saddle.  Ludwig, meanwhile, had begun a villainous monologue about the inevitable defeat of Yoshis by Koopas.

     "At the rate he's going Yoshi will die...of boredom!  Seriously, why doesn't Bowser get a diplomacy unit installed?  Alright.  I might be invisible, but I'm not helpless!  There's probably something around here I can knock Ludwig off his high horse with.  Let's see..."

     She noticed a bee's nest hanging from a tree fifty feet away.  Walking to it, she took out her honey-scented perfume bottle and sprayed around the bees.  It worked.  Within seconds they were swarming out, looking for the source of the odor.  She ran back to where Yoshi was standing, bees in tow.

     "Well, I've got one shot.  Wish I had a better arm  Wait a minute!  Yoshi!  Oh, he can't...whatever.  HERE!"

     So saying she thrust the bottle into Yoshi's hands.  Ludwig, whose speech was finally ending, looked down and laughed.

     "You intend to fight me off with perfume?"

     "All I want is to be left alone, Ludwig.  Fighting is not my, um, task, er... I'll keep you away by whatever means necessary!"

     With pinpoint accuracy he smashed the bottle against the airship's mast, splattering the perfume over everything and everyone on deck.  The bees, passionate as ever, were close behind.

     "What in the name of- TURN US AROUND!" yelled Ludwig to the Goombas on board.  "I won't forget this Yoshi!  Ow!  Hey!  GAH!  GET US OUT OF HERE!"

     Yoshi and Daisy watched as the airship floated haphazardly away, Ludwig yelping as it went.

     "That was close.  He'll be back with reinforcements, of course...oh, no.  That's...a Magikoopa."

     "Naturally!" shrieked their new opponent.  "You didn't believe I'd overlook something like Ludwig yelling and screaming at a Yoshi, did you?  Ah, but you seem out of place, friend.  Perhaps if I escort you somewhere you'll be more comfortable!"

     With this the Magikoopa fired the wand at Yoshi, but Daisy jerked him aside just in time.

     "Strange!  Where did you learn to dodge these moves?  No matter, I could do this all day!"

     "Daisy," Yoshi murmured, "Get out of here right now."

     "I'm not budging!"

     "You didn't budge, did you?"

     "As a matter of fact," said Daisy, who's frustration at the delays had peaked, "if this turkey wants to get to you, he'll have to get through me!  Come at me, Koopa!"

     No one else could see, but Daisy took her stand in front of Yoshi.  The next shot was fired.

     "Wha-?  Princess Daisy?  I- I...you can't be here!"

     "Can't I though?  I've had enough of you and your compadres bugging my buddies.  Now beat it!  Hey...wait.  You can hear me?  And see me?"

     "Not now, Daisy!" cried Yoshi, as the Magikoopa prepared another shot.

     "Yoshi," replied Daisy, "I got this.  Hey, Magikoopa!"

     "What?"

     "HI, I'M DAISY!"

     With that, a beanstalk suddenly shot out of the ground and smacked into the Magikoopa with astounding force, propelling him into the sky and several miles away.  With a face of pure calm, the Princess turned and faced a stunned Yoshi.

     "Um, Daisy?"

     "Yeah?"

     "That was really cool."

     "Yeah?."

     "Can I ask you something, though?"

     "Yeah."

     "Why didn't you do that earlier with Ludwig?"

     "I couldn't."

     "Why?"

     "I can only direct plants and speed up their growth, not make them just appear.  I didn't see the beanstalk plant until after I stood in front of you, so I couldn't manipulate it."

     "Oh.  Why didn't the Magikoopa's blow hurt you?"

     "It was designed for a Yoshi.  All it could do was put me back to normal.  At least, I think that's what happened."

     "Oh.  Well, you're visible now.  We can go home."

     "Well...I dunno about that."

     "How do you mean?"

     "Bowser's a little faster on the draw than he used to be."

     "Oh, no.  You don't mean..."

     "Yep.  Here comes the Koopa King."

     They looked down at the black holes under their feet.

     "Well," said Yoshi, "We weren't planning on meeting Bow-"

(Continued next week).

Vol. 3, Ch. 3 - The Princess' Ride.

     "You wouldn't believe how much of a relief it is to see you...well, sort of, anyways," remarked Yoshi as he walked towards his house with his invisible load.  "I've had the most boring day imaginable.  Nothing at all happened until you came to visit."

     "Funny," Daisy thought out loud, "I was thinking the same thing a little earlier."

     "Alright.  Now let me get my botany book."

     Daisy dismounted as Yoshi began poring through his shelves.

     "Let's see...History of Yoshi's Island? No.  A Melon by any Other Name: Yoshi Philosophy. Hm, I think we have enough of an existential crisis going on as it is.  Oh, there it is!  The Considerably Loquacious Encyclopedia of Flora and Fauna from the Mushroom Kingdom through Sarasaland and...oh, forget it.  Who makes up these titles?"

     He slapped the large book down on a desk, smashing Daisy's unprepared arm, which was invisibly resting there, in the process.  Of course, there was no way Daisy could tell him so, but she still tried to with a flurry of exclamations.

     "So, Daisy.  I'm guessing you probably already know most of the stuff in this book.  To be clear, I pulled it out because I don't know everything about flowers, and I want to know if there's something out there that might have turned you completely invisible and inaudible.  I've never heard of that before, but I can't think of anything else in your kingdom that could remotely pose any real danger of doing that, so I have to look for what seems like a logical explanation.  After all, after you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be true, right?  Here.  Tell me if anything looks promising."

     The pages of the book appeared to turn themselves as Daisy leafed through.  Her search appeared to yield little fruit, however, until she suddenly stumbled across the exact plant she'd seen in her garden.  She froze the page and patted Yoshi on the nose again.

     "C'mon, Yoshi.  Please understand what I'm trying to tell you."

     "Vanishing plant?  'This native flower of the Koopa Kingdom has the power to render one nearly undetectable, or so the legends say.  According to one story, an unlucky princess once stumbled across this plant and was never seen again.  Of course, this is just a silly story, and seems unlikely because' and blah, blah, blah.  Alright.  So you saw one of these in Sarasaland, even though they're from the Koopa Kingdom.  Probably Bowser wasn't the culprit- this little pansy would give him the same trouble it gave you.  This means, though, that if anyone knows how to make you visible again...it's Bowser.  Great."

     Daisy shook her head.  Of all the goofball circumstances to get into, this one really took the cake.  Here she was, invisible and silent to everyone but herself- and the only solution was in Bowser's domain.

     "I guess we better take a Warp Pipe," said Yoshi resignedly.  "I'll need you to hold something in your hands so I can keep track of you.  Can't have a Princess wandering away from her escort."

     Daisy picked up an orange from Yoshi's table.

    "Perfect.  Well, let's get going."

    A short walk and a long pipe later they arrived at the border between the Mushroom and Koopa Kingdoms.

    "Are you ready?"

     Daisy shook the orange up and down.  "I'm as ready as I can be.  Brother, you'd think this would be easier."

    "You'd think this would be easier."

    "That's what I...forget it."

     Daisy hopped on Yoshi's back again and he began walking towards the castle, careful to take side roads through smaller villages and avoid as much attention as possible.  After about a mile he stopped short.

     "You know, maybe we can do this without talking directly to Bowser.  There are plenty of people around here who I could probably talk to without raising an immediate alarm.  Maybe the flower is real common around here and everyone knows how to cure it.  Why didn't I consider that earlier?"

     Daisy shrugged and then realized, to her surprise, that others not hearing her talk made her tend to talk less.

     "Better start simple.  There's a Goomba up ahead.  Let's see what she knows.  Excuse me!"

     The Goomba, noticing a Yoshi within licking range, bolted.

     "Okay, so that didn't work.  Maybe someone else will be more helpful."

     "Heh-heh...oh!" came a familiarly unpleasant laugh from behind.  Yoshi and Daisy whirled around and were dismayed to see Ludwig Von Koopa approaching in his airship.  Daisy quickly tossed her orange aside as Ludwig said,  "Well, Yoshi, this is a pleasant surprise.  You aren't the sort I expected to find on patrol- but it's nice to meet a cousin."

     "The only thing we have in common, Lugwig," said Yoshi icily, "is that we're reptiles."

     "You mean cold-blooded," replied Ludwig with another sinister chuckle.

     "At any rate, I'm not bothering anyone, so I'll see you later."

     "Ah, don't be hasty!  I must extend to you an invitation to Bowser's Castle."

     "I'll have to decline."

     "I'll have to insist."

     "I'll have to resist."

     "You seem a decent fellow.  I hate to kill you."

     "You could be a decent fellow.  I'd hate to die."

     "Then, for the last time, surrender!"

     Yoshi looked his opponent directly in the eye.  "Death first."

     "Brother!" thought Daisy to herself.  "All because I picked a stupid flower.

Vol. 3, Ch. 2 - Help Wanted.

     She turned and went back into the castle foyer.  "Can anyone see or hear me?" she called.  There was no response.

     "Well, nuts.  I wish at least one person knew what happened to me.  The whole castle will be in an uproar in a second."

     She was right.  Soon the castle grounds were ringing with her name.  Some of her attendants were already sending letters to other kingdoms to see if she'd gone, and a search party had been sent out in every direction.  Happy as she was to be missed, the drama annoyed Daisy to no end.

     "I'm right here, and everyone's looking for me.  What in the world happened?  It must have started sometime in the garden.  In fact, I'll bet it was that flower!  It just disappeared right in front of me!  Wait, though - it actually vanished completely.  It was if it had never been there, like it didn't exist!"

     With trembling hands she reached for a flowerpot on the shelf.  To her relief she was able to pick it up without any trouble.

     "Whew!  Well, at least I can interact with the world in some way."

     "Hold it right there!"

     An attendant had walked into the room.  It was obvious that all he saw was a floating flowerpot.

     "Show yourself!" he cried, drawing a sword.  "Who are you?"

     Daisy shouted "It's me!  Hi, I'm Daisy!" but it was evident he couldn't hear her.  He began to approach, sword in hand.

     "Guess I'd better make like pepper and dash," she said, setting the flowerpot down.  She ran to the door, flung it open, and rushed outside.

     Her attendant started close behind her, but he was no match for Daisy's track-and-field skills, and  fell behind quickly.

     After she was about a quarter mile away, she sat down next to a tree.

     "Alright, think.  There's gotta be a way out of this.  Far as I know, no one can see or hear me.  It's probably because of something I did.  Better make sure I'm not dreaming."

     A sharp pinch convinced her of consciousness.

     "The only thing I can do is try to find someone who can somehow detect me.  Hmm...I'm invisible and inaudible, but I can still touch things.  I bet Peach could figure out my problem.  On the other hand, I don't want to think about what Mario would do if he discovered a floating pencil writing a message to Peach in her own castle.  So who else can I try?  I need to get back here as soon as I can, and I can only do that if I have someone's support.  Well, it's a little far by Warp Pipe, but I guess my only chance is Yoshi's Island.  If I can get Yoshi to notice me, he'll vouch for me.  Then Peach can give me some advice about what to do.  Now I just need to find a pipe."

     It didn't take her long.  A short walk down the road brought her to one of Sarasaland's travel pipe plazas.

     "Okay, Yoshi's Island.  And...there it is.  Well, here goes."

     "It's been a boring day," Yoshi sighed.  He was next to Yoshi's Island's pipe plaza, trying to decide whether to stay home or go out and about.  "Maybe I'll visit Daisy; we haven't chatted in a while."  Suddenly he paused.  "Strange.  All of a sudden I can smell her flowers."

     The next second he felt a gloved hand on his nose, and jumped back.  "Who's that?  Where are you?"

     "I wish you could hear me!" cried Daisy, to no avail.

     Yoshi paused.  "Let's see...I smelled flowers, then someone wearing gloves patted me on the nose.  They were nice gloves, like the kind a princess would wear.  Wait...it can't be.  Daisy!  If you can hear me, jump on my back!"

     "Well, okay Yoshi."

     "So you came to visit, huh, Daisy?  That's great!  Well, I do wish you'd come sooner.  Of course, we won't have much of a conversation, since I can't see or hear you, but I know the smell of your flower garden.  It can't be anyone but you.  So...let's see about making you recognizable."

     "Yoshi, I wish I could tell you that that's the most sensible thing I've heard all day."

     "I know."

Continued next week.